A Year in Review...

I can't believe that 2013 is coming to a close. This year has flown by for me.

My year began by ringing in 2013 with my family in our home in Greenville. Shortly after I returned to The Bob to start my fourth semester of college. I studied Elementary Education and through that semester the Lord saw fit to change my direction, I switched my major to Pre-Physical Therapy before leaving school in May.

My summer started on May 4 with a quick trip to Idaho to see my best friend's family, and then another short trip to Seattle to see my family before heading to the sunny mountains of California to work with horses for the summer at camp. During my ten weeks at camp the Lord really worked in my life, and I was able to break down many walls that I had allowed to build around my heart. On August 3 I headed off for my next line-up of small trips before heading back to school in the fall.

I arrived at school in late August ready to go for my fifth semester. I loved my classes and I was blessed with incredible teachers. Throughout the semester, the Lord once again worked in my life in many ways, he allowed closure on things from my past and gave me many new beginnings. I once again switched my major after receiving much counsel and I am looking forward to starting my new year by returning to study Communications.

Thanksgiving and Christmas were a whirlwind of activity with friends and family. I spent Thanksgiving break with two of my amazing friends, and then spent Christmas with my family in Seattle. I will be ringing in 2014 in Northern California with my sister, brother-in-law, and their six kids, just like I did for many years when I was in high school.

God has blessed me tremendously this past year. He has worked in my heart, and the hearts of my friends and family, in ways that I never imagined. He has blessed me with incredible relationships and awesome experiences. On January 1, 2013 I claimed this to be "My Year," the year in which I would go beyond where I had gone before, and I truly did. Sure, there were things that I wished for on that new Years day that didn't end up happening, but instead I was able to learn lessons about friendship, and patience.

As you, my dear readers, ring in the New Year with your family and friends, take some time to look back on your year and at all of the incredible things that God has done for. May God bless you and your family in this coming year. Happy New Year! :)

Careless Christianity...

The other day as I was perusing some of the top trending news articles on CNN, I came across one that really peaked my interest. A college student at a small Catholic University was shot and killed when involved in altercation with a campus police officer. The student refused to comply to the requests of the officer and even took the officers weapon from him and proceeded to beat him with it. In self defense the officer took several shots which resulted in the death of the student. This article was one of the top ten articles read on CNN's website that day. It puzzled me why an article about a small Catholic University shooting would pose so much interest as well as controversy, and yet two weeks earlier when a very similar incident happened at a small Christian college in Virginia, Liberty University, the only station that reported on it was the local news. It never hit any major news stations. Why was this?

I then began to think about the possibility being because it was a Christian school. In our twenty-first century society Christianity is not placed in the best light. Christians are viewed as judgmental, hypocritical, and even rude. People want absolutely nothing to do with Christians or their God, and in many places the death of a Christian is something that some would rejoice over. Why have we come to be viewed that way? Because the truth is...we are. We are careless with our Christianity, and our carelessness has led to our being judgmental, hypocritical, and rude to those around us. We view ourselves as above the rest, when we should be viewing ourselves as on the same level, or even dare I say it less that those around us. We ought to be serving and teaching others about who our God truly is.

We have no problem being friends with those who are open homosexuals and yet we wouldn't dare witness to them for fear of being rejected.

Some stare down their noses at those who listen to CCM and condemn them in their weekly church services, and yet they have no problem getting in their car and listening to music that talks about sex and drugs.

We talk about trusting Christ in times of trial and knowing He has a perfect plan and yet some Christian parents wouldn't hesitate to throw their pregnant 15 year old daughter on the doorstep and tell her to never come home.

We grow a hatred and bitterness in our hearts for those who have wronged us in our past and yet we have no problem with sitting at our dinner table and stuffing our faces with way more than we need and committing the sin of gluttony.

Some frown at those who smoke cigarettes on the sidewalks outside of their workplaces and yet they would have no problem going to a party and getting so drunk they can hardly walk straight.

There are so many ways that on a daily basis we contradict ourselves. We make big things out of the little things, we are caught up in the systematic theology rather than the basic doctrine of our faith. I am guilty of this just as much as the next person. When it comes down to it though, what is truly the most important thing? The most important thing is not whether or not someone attends a baptist church or a more contemporary church, whether you wear jeans or not, rather it is our personal relationship with Jesus Christ. The Bible is very clear about what needs to be important to us, as Christians. We need to have a relationship with Christ, we need to be in the Word in order to grow, we need to have fellowship with other believers in a church setting where the Bible is honored and preached, we need to serve.  The Ten Commandments and The Fruits of the Spirit are not lists of suggestions of things that we could do or things that we could have, they are lists of commands as to how we must live our lives. Love doesn't encompass some, it encompasses all. Joy doesn't mean only when things are going well, it means all the time even when your world is so dark you can't see a few inches in front of you. We are so caught up in catching everyone else's sin that we commit "respectable" sins without a thought.

I know that my thoughts have certainly spurred me to change my thinking about the state of my Christianity. I need to be saddened over sin, my own especially, and I need to truly be the follower that Christ would have me to be. One who comes before Him as a little child and depends on Him for absolutely everything, one who obeys without questioning, and who knows that He will hold my hand when times are scary. I want to be a Christian who changes the world's view of Christians as a whole. Sure, I have different views on things, but that is ok because if my heart's goal is to honor the Lord then that is what truly matters.

See. Curious. Wonder.

See. Curious. Wonder. 
Introduced. Talk. Acquaintances. Smiles. Laughter. Conversation. Knowledge. Intrigued. Leave. 

Home. Sleep? Can't. 
Thinking. Wondering. Curious. 

Working. Wondering. Text. Smile. Response. Text. Laughter. Texts. Conversations. Intrigued. Dinner? Yes. Smile. 

Her. Dress. Hair. Lipstick. Heels. 
Him. Jacket. Tie. Converse. 
Smile. Adorable. 

Restaurant. Talking. Laughing. Smiling. Glowing. Food. Wonderful. Company. Spectacular. Memories. Priceless.

Home. Goodnights. Flying. 
Sleep. Dreaming. 
Happiness. 

Weeks. 
Working. Delivery. Flowers. Roses. Red. Notes. Smiles. Joy. Melting. 
Love? Maybe. 

Text. Dinner? Yes. 
Picnic. Birds. Sunshine. Smiles. Laughter. Classic. Conversation. 
Him. Her. 
Happiness. 
Him. Confession. Love. Her. Shy. Excited. Twitter-pated. 
Love? Yes. 
Smiles. 
Dating. 

Days. 
Wonderful. Bright. Gifts. Letters. Perfection. 
Picnics. Walks. Smiles. 

Sudden. 
Fading. 
Busy. 
Working. 
Nothing. 

Flowers. Gone. Dead. 
Letters. Hidden. 
Winter. 
Relationship. Cold. 
Fading. Fast. 
Love. Disappearing. 

Home. 
Doorbell. Answered. 
Him. Her. 
Staring. Looking.  
Love? No. Gone. Coldness. 
Her. Tears. Him. Sadness. Departure. 

Her. Crushed. Tissues. Girlfriends. Consolation. Sleep? 
No. Heartbreak. 

Working. Mindless. 
Home. Lonely. 
Dinner. Never. 

Months. 
Release. Forgiveness. Talk. 
Him. Friendship? 
Her. Maybe. Attempt. Uncertainty. Gradual. Peace. 
Trust. 

Future. Bright. 
Better. Change. Fixing. 

Friends. 
Party. 
Her. See. Curious. Wonder. Introduced. Again.

To Be or Not to Be...

The weeks have come and gone and it is finally fall in Greenville! The weather is getting colder and the leaves are falling. Today the wind is blowing leaving me with a definite desire to wear a wooly scarf and a sweater. I guess the joke around campus for the next few days will be that Dr. Bob has finally decided to turn the thermostat down here at the Bob, so that it could be fall. In all honesty, though, I love this weather. The crisp mornings, the crunchy leaves, even the grass that is brown...well it's supposed to be, it's always magically green here. Starbucks is bringing back its holiday drinks and boots are back in style. It's a time for change, and even though I just spent time writing a paragraph on the occurrences that have come about to bring on fall for us, that's not really what I'm writing about. I am going to write about change though.

For those of you who are somewhat familiar with Bob Jones culture you may know that we basically could write our own dictionary with all the terminology that we have coined here, like DFH, Artist Series, Triple Sticks, and even 'The Bob'. I suppose that one of the terms that we have that almost everyone on campus knows by the end of their first day here as a freshman is Boje. The definition of Boje is simply this...a person who is a literalist. They live by the letter of the law rather than the spirit of the law. They are the people who normally are not looked upon by most students as someone they would want to be BFF's with. To some they are the outcasts, the weirdos. Recently though, that term came to mean something different and it really gave me something to think about.

On campus there was a small group of students who decided that our campus desperately needs revival and it was time to do something about it. This group of students, who were also friends, started writing a secret publication that would put out a very strong opinion about some of the things that were breaking down our student body. On October 30th this publication was printed and sent out all over campus, the name on the front of the paper, in HUGE black letters was...BOJE. Everyone was shocked. To put that word on anything that a group wanted the whole campus to read was pretty daring. It put a shock factor into play and made everyone curious. After reading though your perspective changed and you saw the genius in the idea of putting out something like that. The perspective was this...there is way too much separation in our student body. We need to join under the common goal of the school to Build Faith, Challenge Potential, and Follow Christ. The point was that here on a campus of over 4,000 students, faculty, and staff, not everyone is going to agree, and that is ok because we are here on a campus where there is plenty of common ground. The first edition challenged us, as students, to make prayer group important and to stop putting ourselves against the faculty. It was a challenge that spoke to me and really made me think. It also took a term that was once used as a joke and made it something that defined anyone who chose to stand with the university and follow Christ, it suddenly became a term defined to unite rather than divide. So then the question is posed, am I a Boje? Yes! I am and I am proud of it. I am proud to stand by the side of Bob Jones University and stand up for what is right and honoring to my Lord. To the students who chose to stand up and say something, thank you, you have challenged me in a way I have never been challenged before.

That's just whats been on my mind for the past week. So with that I will sign off for today, I suppose. I do want to end this post and challenge you, my dear reader, change your perspective. What can you do to be a better influence for Christ?Is there a change that you may need to make? Only you can choose to be or not to be one of those who makes a difference. Put yourself in places that challenges your potential, builds your faith, and allows you to choose to follow Christ. Stand up for what is right, and be the one who chooses to honor Christ in ALL that you do! 

The Keys

Once upon a time there was a little girl.
This little girl was born in a quaint village to two, loving parents.
This little girl had the most beautiful long brown hair and blue eyes.
This little girl's name was Marilyn.
She was exactly what her parents had always wanted.

Her parents loved her very, very much.
When Marilyn turned five years old her parents gave her a very special gift for her birthday.
The gift was a long chain with a beautiful key on the end.
"Guard this key with all of your might, do not give it to anyone until the time is right."
This was all that her father said to her on that day about the gift.
Marilyn was too young to truly understand, but she promised to guard the key.

As Marilyn grew up she became more and more beautiful.
Every day the key hung form the attractive chain around her neck.
No one ever said anything about the key to her, that is until her thirteenth birthday.

On her birthday the little girl, who wasn't quite so little anymore, was in the village square with her mother. While her mother was buying eggs, Marilyn wandered over to a nearby cart. As she gazed at all of the beautiful scarves hanging off of it the peddler's son, a dashing young man with dark brown eyes and blonde hair, came around the corner.
"Good day Mistress. Can I assist you with anything today?" Marilyn was astonished and captured by his incredible physique. She finally caught her breath and replied with a shy, "No, but thank you, i'm just looking."
"As am I, at that beautiful key about your neck. Is it a special key?"
"Yes, very special, my parents gave it to me."
"Would you be willing to sell this key?"
The girl stopped fingering the delicate scarves and looked right into the eyes of the young man.  Mischief gleamed in them and she slowly began to back away from the cart. Her father's words rang in her head, "Guard this key with all of your might, do not give it to anyone until the time is right."
"No, I'm sorry." She said and she quickly fled from the cart and back to the safety of her mother's side.
What was it about this key that it had to be guarded so carefully? She shook the thoughts from her mind and grasped the key tightly in her hand as she followed her mother through the rest of the square and all the way home.

As Marilyn continued to grow up she noticed that more and more people would comment on the beautiful key that hung around her neck. It became a custom to simply say thank you and then try to move on to a different topic. On her fifteenth birthday she asked her father what the key was for. Was it really as meaningful as she had come to believe? Her father would simply smile and repeat the phrase that stayed ingrained in her mind, "Guard this key with all of your might, do not give it to anyone until the time is right." What the phrase truly meant, she was not sure if she would ever know.

As she grew into young adulthood more and more young men would come calling on her home asking for permission to court her. As she watched her father handle each different young man with much wisdom she came to discover that her father seemed to turn any one away who commented on the key. It seemed that there was an intense interest in it, and yet the interest didn't seem genuine to her.

One day while Marilyn was outside tending to her garden a young man came riding up on a handsome horse. As he came to a stop at the edge of the garden, she looked up and greeted him with a warm smile. The young man was tall and had dark brown hair. He smiled politely back at her and dismounted his horse. As he approached she noticed something shinning around his neck. Looking down she saw a key, much like hers, hanging off of a beautiful chain. She gasped, but kept her surprise to herself.
"Good day my lady, I was wondering if by any chance your father would be at home. I had heard he had some work that I could possibly do and was hoping to discuss it with him." She led the man inside and left him with her father. As she continued to tend the garden she pondered the key around his neck and suddenly it made a little more sense. None of the other men who had come calling to court her had keys around their neck. She had never really seen a lot of the girls from the village with keys around their necks either. Perhaps, they had given away their keys. Perhaps its significance was more that she had ever thought. Could it be a key to something?

The weeks went by and the young man who had met Marilyn in the garden that day worked tirelessly for her father. She would watch him with wonder from her bedroom window as he would chop wood, build troughs for her father's cattle, and tend to her father's fields. She saw in him something she had not seen much in the men around her village. What a strange young man he was.

Months went by and the two became good friends. They would go for long walks in the evenings through the village square and he would accompany her to the market. They would race down the road at the end of each day as they let the cattle out to graze for the night. Sometimes they would sit on the fence and talk about the stars and how beautiful they were. After a time Marilyn began to find that she was somewhat attracted to the man. He was good and kind, and he served her family well. There was something deep within her that would sing when he would smile at her, and she could not stop thinking about him. More than anything, though, she thought about the key that hung around his neck, and the matching one that hung around hers.

One evening as the two of them were sitting on the fence gazing up at the starry sky, their conversation went in a different direction than normal.

"Marilyn, I have come to notice the beautiful key that you have hanging around your neck."
Marilyn was surprised, but she didn't feel any hesitation, there was no urge to change the topic at all. "Yes, it was a gift from my parents many years ago. I have noticed that you have one as well."
"This key was a gift from my parents when I was a young boy. For years I have worn it around my neck, but I have never seemed to understand the meaning of it, that is until I met you." Marilyn was shocked! She had felt the same way for weeks now. Her head was suddenly spinning with thoughts. What could all of this mean for her?
"I know now that this key is the key to my heart." He continued, "I have guarded it for all these years, never knowing what for. I feel that you are the one who I have been guarding it for. I believe that you are the one I am supposed to give this key to."
Marilyn stopped and thought for a moment, the key was to her heart, it all made sense now. Her father's words ran through her head "Guard this key with all of your might, do not give it to anyone until the time is right." All of the memories connected to her key filled her mind. It all suddenly became clear. The key was to her heart, her precious heart that she had to guard from the wrong people! The key had been to something so precious, she had been right! She smiled with joy! She felt the time was right. He was the one she would give her key to. He had become her best friend, and someone she could trust. Their keys belonged to one another. She could not have been happier. As she took the chain from around her neck and gently placed her key within his hand her father's words rang in her ears one last time,"Guard this key with all your might, do not give it to anyone until the time is right."

The Fear...

What you are about to read is based off of a dream that I have taken and turned into a story. The purpose of the story is to show the fear of loneliness that some people truly feel. It is something that they cannot overcome alone, it is something that can only be overcome through Christ.

 She walks down the isle, smiling, but through her smile she feels a pain in her chest that she can't explain. She tries to push it aside, today is a very happy day, she must be happy. She reaches the end of the isle and turns around to stand in her place. She watches as the flower girls come down joyously throwing their rose petals on the white runner, giggling and smiling at all the people as they do it. Then the organ begins to play and the crowd stands as the doors in the back of the church swing open and there stands the beautiful bride. Her white gown is flowing around her and her smile is radiant, nothing could top the beauty that was captured in that single moment. There are ooo's and ahh's as she floats down the isle, a bundle of joy with underlying nervousness visible to her blushing bridesmaids. When she gets to the alter the groom takes her hand and the two exchange intimate smiles. The ceremony begins. As it progresses the crowd is drawn into the events that unveil themselves.

The ceremony ends and the bride and groom, now a happily married couple, practically run down the isle with joy bubbling over. The bridal party descends the isle, smiling and happy, but there is one bridesmaid who through the smiles and joy on her face still feels a pain in her chest that she can't explain. As the evening goes on the pain grows stronger and stronger. The smiling, the happiness, it's all too much. The reception ends and the newlyweds take off in a fast car for the honeymoon that every bride dreams of. The guests disperse and head home, laughing and talking about how beautiful the ceremony was. The bridesmaid walks inside and watches as the reception hall is torn down, the beautiful decorations that they spent months looking for and making, hours of work just gone, the happiness that had filled the room only moments ago is just...gone. 

She walks to her car and drives back to the hotel. As she enters the lobby, she notices it is empty, all she can hear is the ticking of the clock. She goes to her room and changes before deciding to go for a long walk along the waterfront. She pulls on a hoodie and wanders the twisting halls looking for a way out, a way out of this lonely, quiet building. Her heart aches again, but at the same time she almost feels like there is some odd connection with the pain in her heart and the absolute loneliness of the hallways. She wanders around and suddenly realizes that she is completely and totally alone. The feeling begins to overwhelm her, she is alone, all alone. The pain in her chest turns into a stabbing pain, she walks faster frantically searching for a way out of the hallways that have now become like a trap of loneliness. She runs, past the room doors, down long corridors,  there is no way out. She is trapped and alone, she screams and no one hears her. She collapses on the floor in a terrified, shaking heap. She is alone...and she always will be. 

She awakes from her sleep. She feels her whole body shaking and tears are streaming down her face. She breathes a sigh of relief, "It was only a dream." She whispers to herself. She pulls her blankets up around her and breathes in and out deeply. Although she tries to fall back asleep, she can't. The pain in her chest is all too much, the feeling of loneliness and fear that has overcome her is too much for her to bear. It is in this moment that she realizes that she has never felt so...alone.

A Milestone Reached

My Dear Readers. First off, I want to thank all of you who have read my blog and followed me over the past year. Even though I don't know who you specifically are please know that just the fact that you are one out of the few who has chosen to read my blog means so much to me. Secondly, after a year of writing faithfully, sometimes ;), my blog has hit over 1,000 views and I think it is time to take it to another level.

I had always imagined reaching this point, and while it may seem insignificant to some, it isn't to me. It's exciting to write and to be read by others. That is why I have decided to go ahead and create a Facebook page for my blog as well as change the name. The process of deciding on a name has been a long one. The past name "Keep Calm and Write On" was good, sure I'll give it that, but it wasn't as personal as I had wanted it to be. It was through a friend that I was able to stumble upon the new name that I  have chosen, "The Unwritten Letters." I chose this name, because that is truly what my blog has become, unwritten letters that will never be sent to an individual person, but rather put on my blog for all to read and be inspired by. Letters are personal, deep, and thought provoking at times, and that is where I want to see my blog go.

This is all just a simple explanation, I know, but I hope that it at least helps to put some light on why I made the changes that I did. I hope that you will continue to read and enjoy my blog as you have done already. Here is to the first "official" post of "The Unwritten Letters."

Don't forget to go like my page on Facebook :)

https://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Unsent-Letters/1425306494354137

Rejecting Rejection...

I want to dedicate this blog post to a very sweet friend who recently shared some things with me. So, sweet girl, this one is for you. :)

She shook her head in dismay at herself as she threw her phone into her book bag. She just couldn't do it, she couldn't send the text. She was so afraid of the rejection that may wait in the responses she would receive. In frustration she picked up her bag and walked out her door to head to class. As she trudged up the sidewalk to her building she had one of those "angel and demon" moments. On her left shoulder appeared what looked like an evil Jimminy Cricket, he sneered as he said, "Don't even bother sending that text. No one wants to eat with you. You don't even have any real friends. No one even likes you!" As she was pondering those words a voice from her right shoulder caught her attention, "You know that's not true. You know that you do have friends and that they love you and care about you very much! Just send the text, don't be afraid. After all, sometimes people are simply busy, but that's ok, you are too sometimes!" With those words she was suddenly filled with a new confidence, and she walked to class the rest of the way with a jump in her step and a smile on her face. When she got to class she took her phone out of her bag and let her finger glide of the send button, fear suddenly gripping her, once again. As the bell rang loudly she tossed her phone back into her bag, a feeling of defeat hanging over her. In her psychology class the topic of friendship among adolescence came up. The discussion in the class peaked her interest as the ideas of rejection and annoyance among friends came up. By the end of the class hour her courage was once again revived and as she left she took her phone out of her bag, and before she could think about it, she sent that text. She waited with anticipation as the message was sent to twelve different people, there was a possibility for so many different responses. After what seemed like an eternity, the responses poured in. Some "no", some "I'm busy, sorry :(" and some "Can't today." Her heart began to sink, she almost gave up. Just as she was about to throw her phone back into her bag her phone lit up again with a new message. She opened it with caution, but smiled at the joyful response, "Of course, I would love to meet you for lunch! :)" She put her phone in her bag and walked to her next class with confidence and the joy of not being rejected. 

While this story may seem trivial to you dear reader, please don't check out for the next few moments of reading, simply because you believe that none of this applies to you. The truth is, we all at one point or another have had this fear, and there has been a point and time where we have been the other person on the other end of that text. The truth is a fear of rejection is natural for us as humans. For some the fear lies in rejection from Co-workers or family members. For me, personally, my fear lies in my friendships. Rejection is something we observe through history, but the one thing that really comes to my mind when I think about this concept of rejection is my God and how He was once greatly rejected. Jesus Christ came to earth for one purpose, to be the Savior of the world, to be our very best friend, and yet on a daily basis Christ was rejected by just about everyone and He is still rejected now. The greatest thing about Christ, though, is that He holds no grudges for being rejected. Rather, He opens His loving arms and welcomes us to come to Him and allow Him to be our best friend. So maybe, even though this feeling of rejection is something that comes naturally to us in our human nature, it' time for a perspective check. Realizing the fact that we may be rejected by man, but not rejected by an Almighty God who loves us so much He willingly suffered daily rejection in order for us to have the opportunity to spend the rest of our lives with Him needs to have an impact on us. So, the next time you are feeling a little bit rejected, or even a lot rejected, look at your perspective. Do you have the perspective of being always alone or do you have the perspective of knowing there is a God who will never reject you? Simply because of that fact you are never alone, even when none of those texts come back with a yes.

A Flawed Perception...

       A mirror hangs on the wall in front of her. She cautiously approaches it until her reflection appears in the glass. She jumps back, but approaches once more, this time placing her hand on the glass almost as if she could touch the face staring back at her. She feels a tear trickle down her cheek. The agony of not being beautiful raged within her heart. She had heard the words from the other girls incessantly "You're not a pretty as she is." and "I know a great work-out program that could help you lose weight." and even "It's a shame you didn't get the beautiful hair and skin that your sister got." Even though these phrases may have not seemed like much to anyone else, they were the ones that pierced through her heart like a dagger, leaving scars with each plunge. The girls and their words weren't the end of it though. Every day, everywhere that she went there were messages of what true beauty was, a size 0, long blonde hair, long, thin legs, and pronounced collar bones. Every model she observed had all those traits and more. They were the beautiful people and she was nothing, no boy would ever be interested in pursuing a girl who wasn't beautiful. As she let the thoughts melt away she examined herself more closely in the mirror. Then she remembered the words that one of her friends had told her that day at school, "I didn't used to be beautiful, I had to make myself this way. I simply just purged myself from all ugliness in every way. I got rid of all my clothes and bought new ones, invested in the most expensive make-up line, and then I even learned a way to lose weight faster, it's so easy, and when it's all said and done you look great!" She felt she knew what she had to do. It was scary trying what she had been shown for the first time, but as she walked away from the mirror and towards the bathroom she smiled to herself and though, "This is what will make me beautiful, and I will not stop until I am, even if it kills me."

The perception of the beauty that the world has created is deadly. All over America girls, beginning at the age of nine, look around and see all the tabloids and the messages that are conveyed by the models and movie stars on the covers of those magazines. They hear it in the songs on the radio and see it on almost every TV show. The perception is this, being skinny makes you beautiful, anything else makes you unattractive, women must dress in a way to allure men, girls must wear make-up to be pretty, and the list goes on and on. Are you beginning to see why this perception is so deadly?

The world screams out about what beauty is, even young Christian ladies hear the cries and believe what they hear while pushing away the small, still voice inside their hearts that says "You are more than enough, you are beautiful because you are exactly the way that I created you to be." Mind you there comes in the reality that taking care of our bodies is important, but that is beside the point I am trying to make. The point is this. We were created in the image of a wonderful and powerful God who has the ability to change us in a second if He wanted to, but He doesn't now does He? No! He doesn't, because we are already exactly the way that He wants us to be! We are beautiful in His sight. Yes, this is a highly difficult concept to grasp and live each and every day because of all the noise about beauty that surrounds us every day, but think about this...

If you do not think that you are pretty enough or good enough because you have flaws...you need to realize that you have those because those flaws make you who you are! They are what make you the most beautiful, because God gave them specifically to you. This is a lesson that I have had to learn recently. Through a series of events and going to see a nutritionist I have learned that my diet is not what it should be, and this has lead to some health issues that I am facing. I allowed myself to be influenced by the world's perspective of beauty rather than listening to God's still, small voice reminding me how much he loves me and how perfect He knows that I am. I allowed a flawed perception to have a big impact in my life.

Never forget....never forget how absolutely beautiful and perfect you are, simply because you are exactly who God created you to be. You are wanted, you are loved, and you are beautiful.

"I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well."

- Psalm 139:14

Little Blessings...BIG Impact

Well dear readers it's that time once again...time for another post from yours truly. This time I am not totally sure what to write about though. I suppose I could compose a piece on the number of iced coffees I have drunk since being back at school, or maybe how much I love the fact that I get to sleep in on Thursday mornings, but neither of those seem to spark any interest for the little writing bug inside of me.

Perhaps I will write about the little blessings that I have received since being here at school, I feel that this is a topic worth writing about.

Since being back at "The Bob" I have received so many little blessings that have impacted me in BIG ways. For starters I am incredibly blessed to have two of the most amazing, beautiful, funny, talented, and energetic roommates in the world! We laugh together and pretty much talk about anything under the sun. We have known each other for only a week and five days and already they are becoming two of my closest friends. I have also been blessed with my amazing friends who are surrounding me once again here at school, both the old and the new. :)

I think my biggest blessing this semester is getting the teachers that I got. I truly cannot imagine what my semester would be like if I had gotten any other teachers this semester. They are all so encouraging and they are pushing me to do my best and succeed. They are always there when I need to just talk or ask questions. I feel like the teachers that I have this semester have a deep, real desire to be my friend as well as my instructor. It is so incredible to see how God has blessed me this semester. I really could not be more thankful that I am right now. :)

Sometimes it's the little things that impact you the most. The people I mentioned above are my little blessings that have impacted me in BIG ways, and I haven't even been here for two weeks yet! God works in wonderful and mysterious ways! As you go through each day I want to challenge you, my dear reader, to look for the little things and thank God for them every chance that you get, I know that I will.

A New Beginning...

Well dear readers, it has been awhile since I last wrote. Summer has finally come to a close and I am sitting at my desk in my new dorm room waiting for my first day of classes tomorrow. :) School...it's the word that starts to circulate among people's vocabulary around mid-August and by the first of September it's a word spoken by someone almost every second. A lot of people don't like school, but I love it. I always have, and I am pretty sure that I always will.

Junior year, those are the words I have been more excited to say than anything for the past few weeks. It's almost a feeling of arrival. Junior year, the year where you have crossed the halfway mark, you become an "upper" classman. For me Junior year says all those things and many more. For me it's being home again with friends and family around me. It's the late night study sessions and the amazing teachers. It's the early mornings with a hot cup of coffee and oatmeal with honey. It's the late night running times with the girls. These are the things that surround me when I am at school. These are the reasons why I love it.

I have been blessed this year to enter this year with a completely new perspective on life. It's brighter and happier, and something I am very thankful for. I have returned with new friends who I love very much as well as experiences that I will never forget. I have also returned with a deeper passion for my writing, something I thought I had lost long ago and was thrilled to find it again this summer. :)

Tomorrow my classes start, and I will be busy with the hustle and bustle of a brand new school year. I am excited beyond what is considered "normal" and I look forward to sharing my experiences this year with all of you. But for now, I will wait for tomorrow with great anticipation, drink a cup of coffee, and Keep Calm and Write On.

The Summer of Vulnerability and Possibilities

Well dear readers, my summer at camp has officially come to a close. Today the Summer Staff of 2013 said many tearful goodbyes and packed up our belongings to make the long journeys home. This has been the most incredible summer of my life. It was a summer where I was made truly vulnerable before my God and before others, but it was also the summer that God chose to drop the promise of many possibilities for my future in my lap. I will try my best to recount my experience of working at camp this summer and how it changed me, but truly unless you were here this summer there is just something about it that only my wonderful team will understand.

When I arrived at Wolf Mountain I was holding back bitterness towards people in my life who had hurt me. I was confused as to why God had "forced" me to come to camp for the summer and make mere pennies an hour when He knew that I had bills to pay and books to buy for school. I was frustrated with my life and it seemed as if much of it was crumbling, once again, right in front of me. My first day at camp I stood in the middle of a catch pen surrounded by 17 horses that I would get to work with over the summer and God and I had a talk. I told God I wanted Him to be real to me and I just wanted everything to go back to normal.

As the summer went on the Lord took my life, emotional, spiritual, and even physical and took it to a whole new level. I learned what it means to love unconditionally. The walls of anti-emotion that I had allowed to build up around my heart were torn down and for the first time in a long time I felt happy and free. It was truly amazing to see how God allowed me to grow this summer. He taught me more about myself than I had ever known before. I've overcome obstacles that faced me when I got here this summer. I overcame the limits that had been placed on my health when I arrived at camp, and I did things that I was told I may never be able to successfully do again with a struggle.

Basically, what it all comes down to is that God gave me an incredible opportunity this summer. When I got here I never imagined that I would come as far as I have. For me the summer was about learning to be vulnerable before my God, because it was at the point when I laid everything aside and let God have his way totally in my life that I was changed. I will never be the same after this summer, and I couldn't be happier about that. Now I know that my choice to be vulnerable before my God has lead me to a dozen possibilities for the future. So as I wait to see what God has in store for me I will live day by day with a new excitement and enthusiasm. But for right now I will Keep Calm and Write On.

Lessons From A Horse

This week I was presented with the question..."What have you learned from the horses this week?"

I had to stop for a minute and think about that. I have really taken my job a week at a time and just gotten through each day not truly paying attention to what God had to teach me through my job. I took the rest of the afternoon to think about my time here at camp and ponder the lessons that I have learned from the horses.

Lesson Number 1: I need WAY more patience in my daily attitude "diet"
Horses are not always the most patient creatures. They have a tendency to be impatient when waiting for trail rides, when going on the trail ride, when vaulting...ok basically all the time. Being a wrangler I have the tendency to get frustrated with them for not being patient and yet how many times a day am I impatient for something and allow people to be frustrated with me.

Lesson Number 2: I need to be considerate of other people's feelings in each situation.
Horses have emotions just like we do. They get scared, they get angry, they are sad and happy. There are so many times a week that I get upset about something or I get scared and I really hate it when people get irritated with me for feeling the way that I do. Being a wrangler I get to experience lots of pony "moods" and I would get so frustrated with them when they would be anything but happy. The thought was presented to me that if I don't like others to be frustrated with me then what right do I have to become frustrated with others?

Lesson Number 3: I need to have a heart that is more submissive.
Since I have been here I have been able to watch a few horses get round-penned. Basically, they get in trouble and get to run around in circles. As we were watching our vaulting horse get a work-out this week we were talking about the way that she was looking, out, away from the person in the middle of the pen. Why was she doing that? She was looking for a way out. I really thought about that and how a horse being worked is like a Christian who is going through a trial that God puts in their path. Until we are ready to be punished for wrongdoing or go through a trial and look to Christ rather than look for a way out we will continue to go though that experience in a painful way.

Those are the things that I learned this past week. Things that God placed on my heart and convicted me about. So with new lessons learned and a wonderful relaxing weekend ahead of me I will Keep Calm and Write On.

Another Week...An Incredible Paycheck

Well dear readers another week has come to a close here at beautiful Wolf Mountain. Tonight I got my paycheck for the week, and what a paycheck it was. Paychecks here are a little different than they are for other people who work a 9-5 job. My paycheck comes in the form of the incredible things that God does in the lives of staff, campers, and even me during the week of camp!

This week God truly showed himself faithful, as He always does, to me and my friends here at camp.   As we were preparing for another exciting week of camp Satan decided to throw some "fiery darts" at us. Almost half of the staff here got hit hard with a virus that took a few out for this week of camp. We really had to work together as a team to fill in missing pieces and make it all work, but God was faithful and provided those missing pieces and allowed this week of camp to be incredible. Monday morning several staff members woke up to no water running through the pipes of their homes, yet another bump in the road that God smoothed out as our water was running again by the end of the day! The Lord also allowed us to have multiple campers come this week who were not saved and presented many challenges to their counselors and the other staff here at camp, and once again God was faithful and we saw lives truly changed for Christ!

This summer I am getting the BEST paycheck that I have ever received, sure I may be a poor college student, still, at the end of the summer, but spiritually I have gained SOOOOO much!! The Lord taught me that I have areas of my life that I need to work on and He has slowly shown me how I can live a life that is more pleasing to Him.

Dear readers please keep the team here at Wolf Mountain in your prayers. We are preparing to send these precious children back to their homes and prep for another exciting week of camp, this time Teen Camp!!! Pray that the Lord will be preparing hearts and minds to receive the word and that it would be another FABULOUS week of camp!! For now I will Keep Calm and Write On...oh yeah...and Finish Med School! :)

Let the Summer Begin

Dear Readers,
First of all I apologize for pretty much dropping off the face of the planet for the past 2 months. Life has been terribly crazy with the semester ending, changing my major, and then packing up and heading out west for the summer adventure of a lifetime!!!

Camp is a big part of my summer adventure. I have been here for three weeks as part of an AMAZING team. I am working as a wrangler this summer. We just finished our very first week of camp with campers. Jr. Camp kept us all on our feet. We are all now enjoying the fact that we have a day and a half to catch up on sleep and relax before we have about 100 campers descend upon our lovely little camp for another week of business and fun.

For now that's about it, I promise I will try to write a little more about camp and the fun things that happen. But for now I will Keep Calm and Write On...and Finish Med School!!!!

This is Truly Just the Beginning...

Well dear readers, it is that time of the semester again when finals are upon us and the stress is mounting on campus. Students are running back and forth all over campus today filled with excitement at the fact that when the 50 bell rings they will never again have to sit in that class and listen to a lecture again! For some of us finals week means the end of our college career, for some it's just the beginning, and for a few of us, like myself, it means that next year we will embark on the greatest adventure of our lives as we start doing what we really want to do.

The summer holds many promises for all of us here at BJU, but one thing I know for sure. On August 31, 2013 this campus will once again begin to fill with the eager students who love this school. It will be a new year, a new adventure. For some it will be their year of triumph and for others possibly a year of failure, but one thing rings true...our God is faithful to carry us through every task that He has asked us to accomplish.

For now though, we look forward to a week from today when the FMA will fill with students, family, and loved ones of the class of 2013 and we watch them all get their diplomas in a ceremony that lasts 2 and a half hours and is anything but interesting, but after that it is sweet freedom for five months. Even though a week and a few days seems so far away until I can get on a plane to leave Greenville, I know it will come so fast. In the meantime I will pray, study for finals, get in every second of sleep and coffee consumption that I can and Keep Calm and Write On! ;)

April 2013....May We Never Forget

April 15, 2013 started like any other day. The sun rose and on the East Coast all the energy and excitement was focused in beautiful Boston for the the Boston Marathon. 79 countries were represented at this race, thousands of runners and spectators filled the streets. In Oregon it was a peaceful morning like any other and as the day went on a little town was shaken by two men setting off homemade bombs. Then yesterday evening the town of Waco, Texas was shaken by  an explosion at a local fertilizer factory that left this town in devastation.

So why do I mention all of these things? Simply this. On Monday as I sat in the last five minutes of my class and heard about the bombings in Boston a sudden fear swept over me. As the reports came in and it was believe to be a terrorist attack my fear grew. Was it right for me to be afraid? At the beginning yes, fear is completely natural. To allow my fear to grow as much as it did though showed me once again that I am a human and I don't trust my God as much as I need to.

As scary as things are in America right now I need to constantly remember that my God is always in control. None of these events took Him by surprise at all. My constant prayer is that my trust and faith in Christ is always stronger than my fear of things that could happen, but have not yet happened. Trusting isn't easy, but it is right.

So, these are just my thoughts on what I have been learning the past few days in light of all of the events happening in our country. We need to pray for our country on a daily basis. So, I will pray and Keep Calm and Trust My God!

A Week of Change

Hello my wonderful readers! It has been a while since I have written, but time has been flying by hasn't it? Since I last wrote I have been able to enjoy a wonderful week of Bible Conference and have got back into the swing of school. This past week of school was fairly mellow and I had a lot of time to think about the messages that I heard during Bible Conference. 

One thing that was prevalent in a majority of the messages was to do the hard thing. This was something that really had an impact on me because there are several areas of my life that I have been resisting doing the hard thing. The biggest one was dealing with my major. Since switching to Elementary education last fall I have really missed my science classes and studying medicine. I began to pray that God would lead me in the right direction. Of course I was automatically drawn back to anything having to do with a medical career, so I began to look for a direction. I was led to Pre-physical Therapy. 

I officially switched my major this past week and I feel very nervous and excited to see how God will chose to lead me through Med school. Being a doctor of any kind has been a dream since I was a little girl. I love going to the doctor and looking at the different equipment  As I got older I would ask the doctor question about their job and would take in anything that they would teach me. I am so excited and I know that it's a long road. 

So here I am...getting ready for med school, praying for continued guidance. I can't wait to see what the future holds, but for now I will just Keep Calm and Write On. 

An Update From the Front Lines of Academia...

Well, it sure has been a while since I posted last. School has been keeping me crazy busy this past month. Besides everything culminating all at midterms week there were a few days of random fun, relaxation, and spiritual refreshment thrown into the mix.

On February 26 we had a Day of Prayer. Basically it is a day that the whole university family takes off from classes and attends various chapel services and prayer sessions throughout the morning. It is a time to focus on God's everlasting goodness through a theme that is prominent in each service. The theme for this semester's Day of Prayer was "Calling on God in Times of Trouble." The morning chapel focused on many of the Psalms that emphasized God being there in our trials, what an encouragement. Then the students and faculty broke into smaller, organized groups and prayed for different things all over the campus. The day ended with a testimonial service where we heard three testimonies about God's constant goodness in trials from various students and faculty. The afternoon was spent resting and catching up on school.

Then came my birthday! It was a very busy day, but I felt so incredibly blessed by all of the wonderful birthday wishes and fun had with friends and family. I got to celebrate with my family on the Saturday after and enjoy some of my Mom's AMAZING New York style cheesecake!

Finally on March 12, 2013 came the day that some of the student at the university have waited four years  for. It was a day when Thunder and Lightning collided in an epic battle of strength, endurance, and wits. Gold Rush Daze finally came once again to Bob Jones campus. For those of you who have no idea what I am talking about to put it simply, it is the most amazing day that any Bob Jones student will ever experience. The day began with sleeping in, always a HUGE plus for college students, followed by a breakfast of warm Krispy Kreme doughnuts in bed. :) The we helped the school break the world record for the longest sub sandwich and after loading up on nourishment we went to battle at Stadium Field. For four hours the students of Bob Jones University watched their teams battle for the title of Champion of the World...ok not quite, but you get the idea. Of course Red Lightning dominated :) We ended the day with watching the faculty and staff do the strangest things during Faculty Body. The night was finished off with a spectacular fireworks show.

So that's pretty much what I have been up to besides school. Now I am settling into the long awaited week of Spring Break/Bible Conference. So much will be going on this week, but I am definitely most excited to see how God will work in my heart through the Bible Conference services this coming week.  But today is Sunday and it's between services, so I will just sit here enjoying this sunny, 70 degree day and keep calm and write on.

The Sweetest Love.

So there is this holiday...

It comes every year right in the middle of February.

It's called Valentine's Day...known to some here at the Bob as Singles Awareness Day. After pondering the predicament that I find myself in being single, but not really wanting to call Valentine's Day, Singles Awareness Day I have decided that this Valentine's Day I am going to thank God for the examples of the sweetest love that I have around me.

Yes, dear readers, that means that this blog post is probably going to embarrass a few people, but I love them all very much so I am sure they will forgive me. :)

The three couples who have inspired me the most to have a love and a marriage just like theirs are my parents, my birth mom and my step dad and my sister and her husband. These couples can be sickeningly sweet at times, passionate about their marriage and their families and they are absolutely perfect together. When I am with them I know that they were meant to be. So to the six of you, thank you for setting an example of the sweetest love that I know. I hope and pray that someday the man, that I date and then marry, and I will have a love that looks just like yours. :) This Valentine's Day is for you. :)

The Lessons We Learn...Over and Over Again.

Sometimes I am surprised by the strange times a person can become inspired to write. Today I felt inspired at about 6 in the morning, but I was awake studying anyway and now I have a little down time before my day begins, so it all worked out. :) This weekend has been one of those really good, learning weekends. I suppose more than anything this post is for my friends who are pre-college and even in college.

Ladies, there are two things that we need to remember. As daughters of a wonderful King remember, He has a perfect plan for your life, and it is beautiful. Guard your hearts...that is a phrase that God inspired someone to write in the Bible, and it is a key to His plan for our lives. Guard you hearts ladies, don't let anyone who does not deserve your heart steal it, even a little bit of it, from you or from God. They say patience is a virtue, and I will admit that there are so many things that I hate being patient for, but I promise that the patience we struggle with is eventually going to result in something absolutely beautiful!

The second thing is this. Don't ever be afraid to stand up for what you believe in. I have been so blessed with amazing friends here at school who inspire me and encourage me. They also point out my faults and try to help me do the right thing, even when it may be the hardest thing I have ever had to do. This weekend I had to do something that I didn't necessarily want to do, but I did it and boy did I find out some things I didn't really see coming. Did some of the things hurt? Sure, a little. What was more important though was that I did the right thing, and my life has changed for the better because of what I did. Don't ever be afraid to be blunt and stand up for what you believe in, but don't forget another Rule of A Lady...

So that's what I have been learning this weekend. Two amazing principles that, in a way, I already knew, but needed to be re-enforced in my life.

One more thing, I promise. :) There is a website that I have seriously just fallen in love with over this past year and I really recommend it.

It is...drumroll please...

http://www.setapartgirl.com/

I am crazy about this website and the woman who publishes and puts all her time and effort into it. She is an amazing author and really has a passion for young ladies. I highly encourage you to look at it and enjoy (She has also written many amazing books that are out of this world!).

So with my desire to put thoughts and inspirations to blog I end this entry with a smile on my face and excitement for a new week and the promises of what God will teach me! But for now, or at least until 9 am, I will just be in my dorm, sitting, sipping coffee, Keeping Calm and Writing On :)

A Plan Beyond What I Expected

These past two weeks have just flown by. I cannot seem to find time to sit down and just take a deep breath! But that is simply the life of a college student. Thankfully though I have had time to sit and spend time with My Lord and boy has He been showing me things I never imagined.

Over the past two weeks the Lord has laid my school in Alaska heavily on my heart. I believe that the Lord has called me to return to Alaska for one year after graduating from Bob Jones University with a BS in Elementary Education and teach in the school that I graduate from. I am thrilled and so, so excited about this opportunity. I truly cannot wait to get up there and have my first time in the classroom as a teacher be at Gateway!

The Lord has also shown me that He has an AMAZING plan for my summer. This summer I get to travel and see lots of family and friends and I get to be a wrangler at a camp this summer!! I am SO EXCITED!!


All I can say, dear readers, is this. God has amazing plans for each and every one of us. Things that we may have once said we would never, ever do, may soon become our goals and dreams. Never turn away from His plan, it's always the best! But for now, I will sit in my cozy dorm room on these chilly winter nights, drink coffee, and Keep on Writin' On. :)

A New Semester, A New Life, A New Start.

Wow! It has been so long since I have posted on my blog! Time just gets away from us sometimes. Well, much has happened since I last wrote. I officially changed my major. I am now studying Elementary Education and I am loving every minute of it. I am also working this semester at the campus dry cleaners. It's a really great job, super fun, amazing people, and a great way to de-stress. I am also living with new passions and goals for myself and I am very excited about them.

Because of all of these changes in my life there will be some changes to the my blog as well. First off, I am going to start posting on Friday nights when I have more time and a day ahead of me with no classes. Also, I am going to try to make them shorter so that more of my college friends who don't have oodles of time can read my posts too :)

I am going to try to share a lot of college stories and lessons that I am learning this semester with all of you, my wonderful readers. I am also going to try to share with you some of the many goals and passions that I now have. With the semester getting under way things are just busy right now. I know next week my brain will be a little less jumbled so I can really get my writing on :) So for now I will sign off and leave you all in anticipation until next week. Have a wonderful weekend.

But until then I will just Keep Calm and Write On :D