Dear 20...

Dear 20,
Another year has passed, and our time together has come to an end, I can hardly believe it. You have brought me many challenges and changes this year that I never foresaw, but they have certainly made me a better person. I have learned to smile more and find joy in the little things rather than staring, puzzled, at the bigger picture of my life. Thank you for being one of the most growing year of my life.

This year I watched dreams become realities. Working this past summer at camp as a wrangler was amazing, and I still think about all of the lessons learned and the skills I acquired while I was there. I also think about all of the wonderful new people that were brought into my life as a result of those two months. Those people became a big part of my life, and they still are. Getting to play golf again is something that I never even came close to thinking would ever happen. On the plus side I get to play on a team for my school, which is so special and meaningful to me. I have only been at it for a few weeks, but already I have learned about dedication and commitment and what they truly mean, they are more than just two words that signify what a person needs to be to a thing or a person, they are two mindsets that are not truly reachable without developing a love deeper than you have ever developed before.

This year I have grown so much spiritually. The daily ways that God showed me His presence in my life still leave me in awe. The days when I would read my devotions early in the morning and that day the message in chapel would be on the same passage still absolutely amaze me, and get me so excited. The moments when I would randomly find a verse and read it, and it somehow always applied to whatever situation I was currently facing. God taught me about sufficiency and placing my trust in Him. He has scolded me for my lack of faith on challenging days, but at the end of it all He is still there with His arms wrapped tightly around me. I have seen the power of prayer and the blessings that a deeper prayer life can lead to. I will never be able to say that I have reached a spiritual pinnacle in my life, but I can say with certainty that this year I have come to know my God more, and my walk with Him has been strengthened as a result of it.

This year I was given multiple blessings. The biggest one being a final diagnosis for the many health issues I have faced for the past several years. When it all came down to it, it was something so small and easy to fix that I could not be more thankful. It has given me a deeper respect for those who I know who suffer with diseases or medical issues that there is no explanation for, and all they have been told is, "you will just have to learn to live with it." I can't imagine their frustration on a daily basis knowing that there may never be an end in sight. It drives me to my knees and makes me thank God for the way He has provided for me as well as praying for cures for things many people don't even know exist. I was able to connect with my Biological Dad and his family this year and that has been an incredibly growing experience for me. I am so blessed to have the family that I have been given. I also got to spend Christmas with my family in Washington. I
t was the most memorable Christmas I have ever had and I hope there will be many more like it in the years to come.

Finally, this year, I have learned to not look back anymore. For so long I have harbored the past as being such a big part of my life that it would drag me down and leave me depressed and unsatisfied with my life. Letting go was an amazing experience and living each day with a renewed hope and joy is un-describable.

So, 20, it's almost time to say goodbye forever. You will be gone, but certainly not forgotten. 21 will be a whole new adventure and I hope that it is just as good, if not better, than you. Thank you for being wonderful.

All my Love,
Karina

Love Bears All Things....

The book of Hosea has never had the reputation for being the happiest or most encouraging book of the Bible, but there is a wonderful example of love at the beginning of this book that I really love. The first two verses of Hosea present a story that rips out your heart and makes you sympathize with the main character. The story of Hosea is about a man who was told, by God, to go and marry a prostitute and have children. Hosea, a Godly man, did as the Lord told him and he and his wife had many children. God told Hosea that the purpose of his marriage and the birth and names of his children were to be an example of what the nation of Israel had become, sinful.

You're probably wondering where I'm going with this, what does marrying a prostitute have to do with love? This past week in my prayer group we have been talking a lot about God's love for us. One of the girls made an incredible point about the story in Hosea and our individual relationships with God.

As a fallen sinner, I am just like a prostitute in my relationship with God. No matter how hard I try I am constantly tempted and enticed by sin, and there are times where I choose to turn from God and do whatever I want to do. Yet, every time that I choose to wrong over right God opens up His arms and forgives me and welcomes me home and still loves me unconditionally.

Hosea had to marry into a difficult situation. He had to marry a woman who lived a life of sin and he never knew for sure that she would never leave him for another man or never cheat on him. Yet, Hosea chose to love her and their children despite everything. God loves us in the same way.

The story of Hosea gives us a clear picture of love bearing all things. Bearing the pain, bearing the sadness, but also bearing the joy of a relationship that will never die.

A Love I Will Never Understand...

Happy Valentine's Day! I hope that all of you are enjoying your day and that something put a smile on your face today, even if it had absolutely nothing to do with chocolate or roses. I know I promised blog posts for my Love series, but for some reason this week writing has not come as naturally to me as it normally does. I didn't want to just leave you all hanging though, so I wanted to share something with you that I have been learning this past week, and it actually is about love.

People ask me all the time, "Why do you believe in God?" The answer is simple to me, but complex to others. I can't explain it in words that even make sense, but I'll try. I believe in God because it blows my mind that someone would love me enough to sacrifice their most prized possession so that I could spend eternity with Him. That is why I believe in God. This week God has been showing me more and more how deeply He loves me. He loves me enough to open my eyes to see a sunrise and wonder at the glory of His creation. He loves me enough to give me peace in the midst of a storm. He loves me enough to put me through one of the most heart-wrenching and painful things I've been through in a while just so that He can draw me closer to Himself. Me, a filthy sinner. He loves me so much with a love that I will never understand.

I don't have a boyfriend, but I do have people who love me. Most importantly, though, I have a God who is jealously, passionately in love with me. He will never leave me lonely, He will never not

be there. His love is so deep, and so wide I will never be able to have a love that compares. On this Valentine's Day I want to thank God for loving me with a love that I will never understand.

A Month of Love...

Happy February and welcome to the month of love.

Sometimes I feel like February could be easily equated to The Hunger Games. All the single people seem to stand out a little bit more and the saying "May the odds be ever in your favor," seems slightly appropriate. 

In all seriousness though, I think that the month of February has become a month filled with a hyped up commercial holiday that has pushed aside the true meaning of love. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not opposed to celebrating Valentine's day at all, I just want to point out that the image of love that has been created by Valentine's Day is not the true image of love. 

So what is love then? Sure, love can be giving a gift to your significant other or carrying in the groceries for the neighbor lady, but it is also so much deeper than that. Love has levels that are not even comprehensible to man. This month I want to publish a series of blogs about examples of that deep love that we see in the Bible. Sure, I'll use some of the common examples, but I also want to find other examples that at first may not seem so loving, but when you look closer you will see it.

I am super excited to try this, and I hope that you are excited to read!